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Visit Sexy Pattycake

Sexy Pattycake (0)

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Marcus (45) 01-01-12  09:12am
Rookie Badge  Talk Back  Pollster  Top Monthly User  Male Profile TRUST USER?   YES (23), NO (0)
Status: Current Member for less than 1 month (at the time of review).
Updated: 03-10-12  04:12am  (Update History)
Reason: Comprehensive rewrite as am a current member
Pros: - Good balance of photos and videos, all of which is downloadable
- Patty is a very pretty, young-looking blonde non-nude tease
- Gets very close to nude while leaving something to the imagination
- Website takes full advantage of her eternal youthful looks
- Features forum and blog, both of which are active
Cons: - Website seems stuck in the 90s in many respects
- Most videos are short and poor quality
- Photo galleries are tiny, normally with only 30-40 pictures
- Slow update schedule compared even to other sole tease sites
- Some content is 'limited time' so won't appear in archive
- Best content is saved for overly expensive downloadable ZIPs
Bottom Line: I must admit I have a soft-spot for Patty, but this a hugely disappointing website offering content that might have been acceptable 10 years ago, but is definitely a long way behind what I'd expect in 2012, even bearing in mind this is a solo website.

Membership costs $29 via CCBill. Do not get fooled by the offer of discounts for long-term members - you save only $2 for every six months you remain a member (maximum two discounts).

Frankly, the content and number of updates don't warrant a six-month membership, and if you do want to remain a member for several months, then you can save $22 by buying their 90-day membership.

Their preview area is probably a fairly accurate representation of their member's site. Once inside, you have options at the top for a blog, bio, photos, videos, webcam and forum.

The bio has full stats for Patty (height, weight, vital stats), favourite films etc, plus a short introduction. The blog is a relatively new addition to the site and is updated occasionally with thoughts from Patty and a few candid pictures.

There are around 200 galleries, but not a single gallery I viewed had over 50 photos. The photos themselves are only 1024px on their longest side, which is pretty low-fi nowadays, even on my little monitor. I can't think of any other website that consistently offers such low-res photos in such small galleries. The photo content is good, but you feel like you're only getting half of the story as there are so few photos.

Navigation-wise, galleries are arranged onto 13 pages with a thumbnail gallery of photos. You can save all pictures, but there are no downloadable ZIPs.

Content-wise Patty is a great tease. She must be in her late 20s now, but hasn't aged at all. Most galleries have her removing her underwear, there are handbras, implied nudity and often slips here-and-there. Sometimes she'll have a dildo or something, but from what I've seen there's no insertion.

They definitely take advantage of her youthful looks. Lots of candy colours, Patty wearing bunny ears, posing in front of cuddly toys, lots of Hello Kitty backgrounds etc.

Video-wise, there are around 250 videos, which - at best - are only OK quality-wise. The very best quality is 768px wide which, again, is very low quality for 2012. Most videos (and I mean around 200 of the 250 available) are 352px which, for videos released in 2010, is very bad (and I don't have particularly demanding standards, either).

Most of the videos are her stripping on a bed, playing in the shower or doing a strip tease to teeny bop music. She's pretty good, and there are nip slips scattered throughout the latter videos, but the quality is poor to the point there's little-or-no pay-off in that respect.

Most of the scenes are split into two-or-three parts. With other updates in between, along with a pretty pedestrian update schedule, it's likely to be several months until you manage to download the whole scene.

The videos are arrange chronologically, with a thumbnail preview and an option to stream a few of the newer ones. Only one format is downloadable (MP4 for newer videos, MPG for the majority), no indication of file size (although most are 50-200mb) or running time (most are 5min long), and no description other than the video title.

There is a section for webcams, which is an archive of screenshots from her webcams. Most of the webcams seem to just be the same as her videos or galleries, but there are hundreds and hundreds of small (600px wide), blury screenshots. No videos and no clue as to where her webcams are available or when the next show is.

The forum is active, and Patty clearly has passionate fans. No input from what I can see from Patty herself though, and although there's a 'Patty Tweets' thing on the membership homepage, I'm not sure if she's on Twitter or not as there's no link to it, so I think it's just a kinda member's only news feed. No sign of interaction here, either.

Unfortunately, the best content is saved for ZIPs which have to be bought on top of membership. There are discounts for members, but at $35, it's still hugely expensive and 'In Training', though hot, was hardly on another level to what's available on her site. Another cynical aspect by her webmasters is splitting member's videos into 3 parts, so with updates in between, you have to remain a member for months to get a whole scene.

To summarise, Patty is wonderful, but her website is hugely disappointing, particularly compared to other solo tease websites. A lot of the content is pretty samey, the update schedule of one update a week maximum is pretty disappointing, as is most of the content.

680x354 videos, 1024x680 pictures and 30 pictures per gallery might have been OK ten years ago, but definitely aren't in 2012.

Patty's site is a jack of all trades, master of none. The video content, pictures and interaction from Patty are all below average. Patty is great, but her website has hardly moved with the times.

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Review Replies (2)

Replies to the user review above.

Msg # User Message Date

1

tboy (7) urgh, really sad to hear this is still the case :(

If she redid her website and upped her vids to HD with a more frequent update schedule and I'd be back like a shot!

I agree as well that it feels like a cynical ripoff but they know she has a dedicated core following so they can get away with it, it's tease taken to a real extreme.

05-15-13  12:49am

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2

Marcus (45) REPLY TO #1 - tboy :

It's strange because I think she's great - she's been doing strip tease ever since I've been into porn and it doesn't get boring, but I always join her site every 6-or-so months and every time it just leaves me feeling unfulfilled - it's a shame.
05-15-13  02:32pm

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